I Crave Rapport

No One Belongs Here More Than You - Miranda July (tomorrow I’m going to give it to Julia, who isn’t expecting it)

Game Feel - Steve Swink (though I told him I can’t progress until he finishes his code examples)

Paso Robles 2003 Zinfandel Port

Non-Programmers Tutorial for Python - Josh Cogliati

Geometry and Meaning - Dominic Widdows

Blanton’s Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey

Music, the Brain, and Ecstasy - Robert Jourdain

Among the Elephants - Iaian and Oria Douglas-Hamilton

Aqua Vitea Summer Ginger Kombucha

Beginning Pre-Calculus for Game Developers - John P. Flynt and Boris Meltreger

National Geographic “Ice Baby: Secrets of a Frozen Mammoth” issue

Maybe I should work on pairings.

When I started this blog I said (to myself as much as anyone) that I’d record my full range of emotions and perspective about my creative work.  Well, when it comes to a large-ish chunk of what I want to do in the near future, that emotion is doubt.  Doubt about whether I can do it, whether I should do it, whether I am the world’s best person to do it, and whether that even matters (since it shouldn’t.)

It’s the difference between progressing steadily upward on what I already know I can do, in order to do it incrementally better (even if it doesn’t satisfy me), or jumping off the ledge that I’ve never tried before.  The leap could make me look like a fool.  The leap could ask so much of my time and energy to reach an acceptable quality that I will never create something worth showing to the world.  But it could recreate me if I succeed.

Naturally I’m jumping.

The breakthrough came when I recognized that I could simply talk (and create work) about this anxiety, when I accepted that I’m not alone, and it’s no shame.  That I can’t be the only person who is trying to learn difficult skills halfway through her life, trying to start from creative ground zero.  I used to call myself “an artist without a medium,” but I think that was my way of hiding that I was reluctant to start from nothing, like I would have to.  If only I’d started then!  But, I’ve long been one of those people that needs to be smarter, more skilled, more creative, more outright clever.  This prevented me from doing what I needed to do.

But hopefully not any more.

print "Hello, World!"

Wow, I got really lucky on this one.   GDC Vault released a few more presentations to their free content collection, and the Indie Game Maker Rant is one of them.  So, If you’d like to see my presentation “Games to Get Her Off; or, How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Female Orgasm (Game)” then just head on over!  My rant is the first one.

Design notes for Live Game Code

I’m getting ready now like crazy for my Live Game Code event at the Biennale de Montreal.  Thursday night is Live game Sounds, a fun chiptune and projection show, and friday and saturday, cindy and I are designing and creating games, tracking our progress in as many and varied ways as we (or you) can come up with, and letting you watch.  Come meet (or become one of) our sexy lab assistants, and bring us chocolate.

Don't Fall off the Top Bunk!

Procrastination pays off!

I’ve been meaning to upload the slides from Erin and my (Erin’s and my?  Erin and my’s?) winning Game Design Challenge presentation, “Our First Times,” but things have been hectic lately.  Now no need, there’s something even better - Think Svcs has made the Challenge session one of their free videos available in the GDC Vault!   Video, plus slideshow, decently indexed in a 2.0ey standalone web app.  Enjoy.

Game Design Challenge 2009: My First Time

A recent conversation with progrium reminded me of an academic paper I wrote in 1994 about “the network” as a recurring metaphor in feminist philosophy.  I dug it up off my old 286 archives and cleaned it up here for your amusement (sans a few citations).

The Network: modulation of a feminist metaphor

Among other archaisms, I use Gopher as my example of the internet’s rhizomatic structure.  And I say stuff like this:

While I began my research expecting to outline the linear development of a cultural metaphor from its organic origins to its technological currency, I came to the realization that in a moment of prescience (which we should remember is pre-science) I had more aptly titled my paper towards its teleos: this is an observational fragment of an idea in fluctuation.

p.s. I still love you, Donna!

There’s so much to talk about; I’ve become a bit immobilized!  It always takes a few days (weeks?) to recover from GDC, and since like most of us I came down with a cold as soon as I returned, it’s only now that I’m resurfacing a little.  I promise I will soon upload the slides from the presentation of Our First Times, the winning design that Erin Robinson and I delivered at the Game Design Challenge.  And maybe even the minimal slides from my Indie Game Maker’s Rant, which many of my friends missed because I volunteered to speak first, and they couldn’t get into the room right away.  That’ll teach me to break the ice.  Anyhow I heard that one of the game news sites was videotaping the Rants for webcast, so I’ll share that if I hear more.

Meanwhile, pleased to be content with this nifty Google mashup by Jonathan Basseri, which visualizes the global struggle to be unique for four minutes and thirty-three seconds.  It has been really fun and gratifying to watch the interpretive debate swirl around 4′33″ since we unleashed it in February.  And even more so that the dialog extends in code as well as words.

EMERGENCY.  TANK AND CHOPPER CAN DESTROY THE CALCULATOR IN WHICH THE BEE FARMERS ARE HIDING, THEN RUN OVER THE BEE FARMERS AND SHOOT ALL THE BEES.

THE ROBOT SPIDERS, WHO ARE FRIENDS OF THE BEES, CAN BE DESTROYED.

THE SOUND OF THE EXPLODING SPIDERS ATTRACTED THE STEALTH SHIPS.

THE BOSS HAS THREE EYES SEPARATE FROM ITS HEAD, AND THEY CAN BE DESTROYED.

SOON TO BE A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE.

download gaba aba

Sorry for the lack of updates!

I just gave my keynote presentation (subject: how games can motivate social change) at the Nordic Game Jam, the biggest event of the Global Game Jam happening this weekend.   After 2 days in airports waiting for bad weather to clear, I’m running on 2 hours of sleep, 2 cuban beers, and a tonne  of post-keynote relief.  Oh, and a giant bag of danish candy.

Cactus and Petri, NGJ 2009

It’s a great feeling to be among friends who you don’t see that often, and collaborate with them.  Even if I’m falling asleep on my feet, I managed to take this picture of the initial brainstorming session for my game “team.”  It’s Cactus and Petri, with me as a completely useless “member.”  I’m setting up to do some sound work, which could be pretty silly since we were talking about using sfxr for sfx, and Songsmith for music.  Heh.  Does the term “third wheel” even apply when it’s relative to a duo of unicycles?  Hey, I can’t complain.  I get to sit in a room with Petri and Jonatan and actually watch them in action.  How many people can say that?

2009 is the year I will learn (the basics of) programming.  Maybe I should just start now, here.  Nothin’ else for me to do!  [UPDATE:  I did end up doing things.  Many things.]

I’ll make the presentation file downloadable real soon here.  Some people also video taped it so that might be available soon.

The day the gamma games are due is my new favorite fall holiday.   And that’s TODAY!  There’s nothing like opening your inbox to find five or six awesome new games that were made by amazing people in two months. And to be the first person to ever see them, and imagine how mindblown people will be when they see so many of them in one place, next month. Compared to my actual birthday, well, there’s basically no comparison.

So — thanks, you game creator people!   I can’t wait to see what you did.

The future is shining like a peace of diamond lying
down to the ground and ready for someone to grab it.

- Slindile Cele, grade 11

One of our group’s most memorable experiences in Cape Town was the afternoon we spent with Ikamva Youth (http://ikamvayouth.org/) in Khayelitsha township.  Ikamva Youth works with 10th to 12th grade students (”secondary school learners” in South African parlance) to provide skill training, tutoring sessions, summer school, creative expression programs, mentorship, and more.  It’s entirely run and managed by a team of volunteers, many from local universities.  Our team from Champlain College spent a few hours tutoring eager “Ikamvanites” in biology, physics, and economics, and in the process, finding out just how much we did NOT remember from high school!

Through Our Eyes, by Ikamva Youth

Recently we learned from Ikamva organizer Joy Olivier that they have just released a brand new book of poetry and photography by the youth of Khayelitsha, titled Through Our Eyes.  Available on-demand at blurb.com, the proceeds of the book’s sales go to help fund Ikamva’s programs.

The book, which you can preview on the Blurb web site, is a candid glimpse into the life experiences of young people growing up in Khayelitsha today - their hopes, dreams, and perspectives.  After seeing Cape Town’s young people in action, we know how important these dreams are, and how crucial it is to encourage the dreams whenever possible.  Here is the link where you can get your own copy of Through Our Eyes, take in some incredible words and images, and show your support for the young learners of Khayelitsha!

http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/300239